Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I woke up on the stairs at of a Disneyland hotel. Yes, my night was amazing.
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he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
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Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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