Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He wants to buy me a wedding ring and pretend to be married to someone else when we fuck. It actually makes me wet thinking about it.
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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