i think my mom watched the whole time
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
professor came back from spring break missing a tooth
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Do you think it's safe to mix miralax with a tequila sunrise?
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Ladies don't puke and tell
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize