I swear she didn't look like that last week.
There's a vagina buried somewhere in there.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Randomize