Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
How do I recover from singing "your body is a wonderland" on his voicemail?
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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