that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Thanks for the pic It's going to be lovely dealing with my boner while I'm in a meeting with your father.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
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