I passed out in the cab. Woke up to the cabby yelling SIR SIR WE ARE AT THE TRAIN STATION!! SIRRRR!!
i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
woke up with a sweatshirt on that said "someone special calls me grandma" and a sword. i'm just going to assume that it was a good night
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
Randomize