Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i came outside and he was eating her out on my lawn. i refuse to pick up the dog shit in my yard so i hope he chose the spot wisely
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
You wear a dinosaur suit one time and everyone thinks you're a furry. Fucking hell, man.
so horny i almost want to text him..and then i remember the restraining order i have against him
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize