Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
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He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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