Can one do a walk of shame from one's own hotel? Considering I just barfed in a planter down town in from of a bunch of business men in suits on my way to a work breakfast on a Wednesday morning, I am gonna just go with yes.
Need a ride. Apparently screaming about the bartender's erectile dysfunction gets you kicked out.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Drunk dialed the ex last nigh; turns out I miss dialed. The stranger who answered played along and apologized for sleeping with my cousin. She sent me a txt this morning to let me know.
Kindest stranger ever. Marry that girl.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Woke up with a pineapple again... where do i keep on getting these ??
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
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