You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Let the record show that I hate your ass.
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