The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
i kind of just want to tell my cleaning lady I'm an alcoholic so it's not awkward when I stumble out of my room to go sit in my car for 2 hours and wait for her to finish cleaning the several empty bottles of wine in my room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know those twins i had a crush on in grade school? Just woke up between them. Best. Party. EVER.
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I have the overwhelming need to take care of him. Both with my vagina and like emotionally.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Found sauce from last night's pizza rolls wedged under my phone case... While sitting in my 8 am class. What happened last night?
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
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