she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
I can't leave. She doesn't trust me and my penis being out in the world without supervision.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ME TOO. Am adrunk madr out qith. White guy. Guy de white. Blanco chico. Chico de blanco
Is it acceptable to pay for WiFi on flights solely for the purpose of getting on Tinder to find a sugar daddy on the plane that doesn’t mind upgrading me to first class?
Do it. You’re flying for two weddings. You’re gonna need that first class.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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