So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
Did you guys seriously let me trade my id for a kebab last night??
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
Kid got so high from the brownies he forgot his own name. Welcome to college.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
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