he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm soaked in champagne. I'm eating oatmeal from mcdonalds tonight was glorious
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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