You need to always be prepared. Like a sex firefighter.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I miss the time when Mondays weren't the new Thursdays. I can't drink like my 17 year old self anymore.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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