someone called me shannon dorrhety annnd it hurt my feelingsd.
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I woke up this morning in the house, I didn't realize it was physically possible to duct tape a person to the wall...
don't you dare blame getting arrested on me. you sugested we play the penis game and we all know I'm a strong competitor
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I just used my vibrator to scratch my back. This being single shit is for the birds
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
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