i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I think your dad took our porno
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
Opening my shipments of mascara and nipple pasties this morning like a boss bitch
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
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