elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
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I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
you're not a real person. you're actually just like a box of wine that can talk
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
You don't have a wife, you don't have a dog, and you need a new bong. Don't make this any worse than that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turns out floaties are a great thing after a couple bottles of vodka
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
My parents left me the house for the weekend...you know what that means?!
Harry Potter marathon and no pants.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
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