Your parents are going to be so confused in the morning
More like pissed. but ill be sure to explain my pathological fear of terrorists hiding in the bathtub
I wish i could be there for it
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Living a little to me does not involve choreographed Michael Jackson songs
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
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