Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
it went well until I said "me" instead of "my" and he kept sexting me in character as a pirate
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
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