the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
never play flip cup with pint glasses
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Walking around as slutty Ron Swanson is amazing
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
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