Reflecting on last night, I'm not sure if making out with a 43 y/o married woman at Bernie's after the Cubs game was my best life decision...
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Randomize