Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize