Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
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we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
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no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
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