Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
It's a Saturday night and I am in bed with two cats, a bottle of Riesling, and I'm masturbating to Iron Man. I'm great at being 21.
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
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