People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Apparently at one point I was wearing my sweatshirt backwards like it was normal and then I threw up into the hood. Never drinking again.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I'm having sex on a snuggie, yes i stopped to text you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I have a gash on my leg an a lobster leg in my purse.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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