sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
People don't believe me when I say the bruises are from work. They just smile and say "right." Trust me, I WISH my sex life was that exciting.
Randomize