To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
She was stumbling around looking for her cat. She said i could help, but i had to call him by his jungle name
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
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