I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
We snorted a line of cocaine and xanax, and then played a game of Backgammon. It was surprisingly therapeutic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
Nothing will ever prepare you for the moment when you are sitting on your friends bathroom floor with no pants on eating string cheese & pita at 2am.
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
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