So. Did i wake up at 430, try to drive home, stop to throw up at a shell, and try to clean out my car and drop my keys in a full dumpster? Yes.
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
Noooo. I told you she WAS a cancer. Not that she HAS cancer. This was the one time being a doctor didnt get you laid you alcoholic bastard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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