i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Consider it an appointment to improve my blow job capabilities.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize