Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Take xtc, wait 20 minutes and then take a shower. Trust me.
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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