just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
This lady is talking to me and all I can think about is getting face fucked and doing cocaine. Not neccesarily together and not neccesarily in that order
Randomize