im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
i was so high it looked like the chipmunks movements were coordinated to that lady gaga song
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
he is training for a marathon but can't last more than five minutes on top. worst tuesday night ever
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize