so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
update: the house isnt on fire anymore, but he is still pissing on all your stuff.
the house was on fire??
shit I thought I told you.
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
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they found her hiding behind the couch trying to feed a cabbage patch doll a bottle of tequila. please tell me she's on birth control.
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
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It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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