Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
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