I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
There appears to be a lake on my nightstand. As usual, I should not be considered a suspect. Together, we will find out who did this.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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