My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
Even my vagina gasped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I wanna get "leaving my dick in charge" drunk.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I look like slutty woodland creatures dress me in the morning. Everybody's got problems.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
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