Rocking a Headband at the strip club, because of Rock of Love this shit is like their kryptonite, I smell like stripper butter and back child support.
My hand turned me down
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors
Fuck he won the bet
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
Stop saying "make it happen". I'm not gonna say "hey, you should get naked with your sister and roll around together while I penetrate you both"
Yes. Do not say that. That will not make it happen.
Still. Make it happen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
Randomize