I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
She abandoned me on the doorstep of her hostel. Turns out you can't bring one night stands into those places. Slept in a train station next to a tramp. He gave me chips. And didn't steal my shit while I slept. So I'm counting this one as a win
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
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