Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
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