What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you made cordon bleu at 4am and declared you were Marshall Stewart
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize