have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
one day john is going to snap and they are going to make a new show called "john and chainsaw minus 9"
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I'm about to initiate a game of drunk UNO.
Drunk UNO has officially been banned from now until forever.
drinking ice water after you brush your teeth, is like Antarctica blowing a load into your mouth.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I'm honestly just saving all my liver's power for when I die this weekend. that's how it works right
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