it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last week was the 4th time a girl cried after sex. I'm seriously doing something wrong
I don't really want to explain to you right now but i just ate laundry detergent
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
I just fell off a roof. So I'm kinda chillin for a minute.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
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