Texts From Last Night

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  (203): View more from Connecticut

  Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her

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  (203): Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her http://tfl.nu/iis3
  Replies (32) Good night (5059) Bad night (722) Order T-Shirt
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self

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  (336): i woke up and my collection of plastic neon wayfarers were half-melted in the microwave. my drunk self hates my hipster self http://tfl.nu/v0ky
  Replies (24) Good night (4306) Bad night (955) Order T-Shirt
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.

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  (913): he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying. http://tfl.nu/sfs9
  Replies (18) Good night (1512) Bad night (4193) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.

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  (716): You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook. http://tfl.nu/wajd
  Replies (18) Good night (5637) Bad night (1359) Order T-Shirt
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.

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  (404): Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party. http://tfl.nu/y163
  Replies (17) Good night (4511) Bad night (971) Order T-Shirt
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us

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  (405): Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us http://tfl.nu/zowi
  Replies (4) Good night (4304) Bad night (866) Order T-Shirt
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  (312): View more from Illinois

  This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.

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  (312): This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck. http://tfl.nu/7nbz
  Replies (28) Good night (4944) Bad night (2084) Order T-Shirt
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  (815): View more from Illinois

  I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me

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  (815): I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me http://tfl.nu/9tpu
  Replies (15) Good night (6117) Bad night (765) Order T-Shirt
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  (479): View more from Arkansas

  He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.

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  (479): He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave. http://tfl.nu/idj5
  Replies (6) Good night (653) Bad night (3016) Order T-Shirt
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  (575): View more from New Mexico

  I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE

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  (575): I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE http://tfl.nu/fcs3
  Replies (8) Good night (3795) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.

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  (219): Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though. http://tfl.nu/18ka
  Replies (2) Good night (898) Bad night (604) Order T-Shirt
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  (804): View more from Virginia

  Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!

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  (804): Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body! http://tfl.nu/7w2d
  Replies (4) Good night (1018) Bad night (476) Order T-Shirt
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  (630): View more from Illinois

  I won't apologize to a one balled man

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  (630): I won't apologize to a one balled man http://tfl.nu/49il
  Replies (9) Good night (560) Bad night (817) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something.

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  (206): I remember having the weirdest thoughts and thinking our room was a compass and we were in the compass or something. http://tfl.nu/vmm1
  Replies (1) Good night (600) Bad night (389) Order T-Shirt
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.

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  (651): We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it. http://tfl.nu/ubme
  Replies (5) Good night (1173) Bad night (158) Order T-Shirt

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