You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
So I'm at the Chevron by your house. I need a condom and a couch.
Together?
Preferably.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
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I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
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I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
Hey can you explain why there's a dissected coconut in my purse????
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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