When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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