just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
Just ignore his excessive use of exclamation points and be happy this one is of age.
You fucker.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Below this exterior of ice is a layer of cum. Followed by a pool of gin. More cum. Then, finally a heart.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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