my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
You told her dad that you were gonna "superman that ho" I love the first impressions you make
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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